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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25883902">Sorry-Drarry</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ameschwie/pseuds/Ameschwie'>Ameschwie</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Harry Potter LGBTQIA+ OS [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Suicide Attempt</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-13</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 10:13:33</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,183</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25883902</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ameschwie/pseuds/Ameschwie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>a drarry os inspired by the song sorry by sleeping with sirens. it's a bit angsty</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Harry Potter LGBTQIA+ OS [4]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1875421</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>43</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Sorry-Drarry</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Trigger Warning: includes self-harm, suicide attempt and rape</p>
<p>the text in cursive are the lyrics to Sorry by Sleeping with Sirens</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>I've been thinking lately about you and me, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And all the questions left unanswered, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>How it all could be. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And I hope you know, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>You never left my head. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And if I ever let you down, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm sorry.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Dear Harry, this is like the 100th letter I'm starting and let me tell you I feel pathetic. Everytime I write something it sounds bad and I have to restart. But this letter is long overdue, so here we go. I've wanted to tell you this for so long but whenever I felt like I could tell you, I ended up having panic attacks alone in my room. Now that the war is over I feel like I can tell you without having to be scared as much as before.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>I see you around here lately, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>You smile brighter than you should. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And me I've been so lonely, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm glad you're doing good. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Cause' I can't forget, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>The way you used to be, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And if I ever let you down, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Well I'm sorry.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>When I saw you in the Daily Prophet a few days ago, I finally got the guts to start writing this letter. I've always wanted to be your friend. Not because you were famous, no because you seemed nice. And I regret the way I talked to Weasley and Granger to this day. Even if that was what I had heard everyday growing up, it wasn't right. I should have apologized right away but I was scared that one of the other students would tell my father about that and I was so scared of my father, you have no idea. So, to make him proud I started bullying you. And I hated every second of it. But my father was proud and it managed to make him less angry about the fact that Granger was better than me in almost every subject. But Granger is brilliant and she already was back then so I really didn't stand a chance.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>No I cant let you go </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And you know that you can take all of me, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I swear I will be better than before, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>So sing it back.</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>No, I can't let you go.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I also always was very jealous of your friendship with Weasley and Granger. You went through so much but you always had them to support you no matter what. I didn't have that until later in my life. And I would have really needed a good friend to lean on in sixth year. Yeah, I had Crabbe and Goyle but they totally agreed with the concept of the deatheaters and they would have told them everything the moment I confessed that I didn't want to be a deatheater. And I really didn't want to be. I didn't have a choice. It was being a deatheater or my parents and I would have been killed.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>I'm sorry for the things I've done, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Things I've done. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm sorry for the man I was, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And how I treated you. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm sorry for the things I've done, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>Things I've done. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm sorry for the man I was, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And how I treated you.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I know that just saying sorry is not enough but I just had to get that of my chest. It's up to you to accept my apology or not and I completely understand if you don't accept it. I've also written a letter to Weasley, Granger and Longbottom since you are the ones I tormented the most.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>No I can't let you go </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And you know that you can take all of me, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I swear I will be better than before, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>So sing it back. </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I know that you have probably heard about my failed suicide attempt. Do you want to know why I did it? After the war was over I decided to leave the wizarding world behind for a while so I moved to America. I went to college there. In the beginning, it was amazing. I had friends, nobody judged me because they didn't know about my past and I was finally happy. But then I came out as gay and the problems started. My college was pretty accepting as a whole but there was this group of guys that were completely homophobe. They started bullying me a lot. They punched me and made fun of me. I could have used magic to get rid of the but I had promised myself to never use magic again so I didn't. One day they beat me up so bad I ended in the hospital. It was horrible. They started to bully my friends because of it so in the end I only had one friend left. She was amazing. Her name was Lucy and she was the only one who knew about my wizarding past. She knew everything. And she still loved me. She was the most important person to me in the world. But my bullies got to her. They raped and killed her,Harry. They put her dead body right in front of my door. I was the one who found her dead and naked body. I gave myself the fault for her death, I still do. If I had used magic to make the bullies fuck off they wouldn't have killed her. It was my fault. Once she was gone I had nobody. My family hated me and my only friend was dead. My depression came back stronger than ever. I started harming myself and one day I couldn't stop cutting. I landed in the hospital once again. Somehow a doctor recognized me and contacted my mother. That's how I got back to England. I'm telling you this because I finally understood how you felt. You lost so many people that were important to you during the war and me bullying you didn't help you feel better. So, sorry for all these years of bullying.</p>
<p>All this happened almost a year ago. And now I know that life isn't always easy and that one could die any second so I decided to get over myself and write these letters. I've always liked you, Harry. I've had a crush on you since 4th year and when I saw you in the Daily Prophet I realized that these feeling never left. I'm writing this so I can leave knowing that I told you. You don't have to answer to this letter. I'm leaving England again and I don't count on coming back this time. I'm probably never going to see you ever again so goodbye.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em>No I can't let you go</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I've been thinking lately about you and me,</em>
</p>
<p>
  <em> And all the questions left unanswered, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>How it all could be. </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And I hope you know, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>You never left my head, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>And if I ever let you down, </em>
</p>
<p>
  <em>I'm sorry.</em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>I hope that you will be able to forgive me. I'm really, really sorry about everything you had to go through because of me.</p>
<p>Greet Granger and Weasley from me and I hope that you'll have the most amazing lives you could wish for from now on.</p>
<p>Draco</p>
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